Ladies: If you accidentally over-salt a dish while it's still cooking, drop in a peeled potato and it will absorb the excess salt for an instant "fix-me-up".

Real Woman: If you over-salt a dish while you are cooking, that's too damn bad. Please recite with me, The Real Women's motto: "I made it, and you will eat it and I don't care how bad it tastes. You're lucky I even cooked!

Ladies: Cure for headaches: Take a lime, cut it in half and rub it on your forehead. The throbbing will go away.

Real Woman: Take a lime, mix it with tequila, chill and drink. Take at least 1 Vicoden.You might still have the headache, but do you think you will really CARE at this point???

Ladies: Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar cone to prevent ice cream drips.

Real Woman: Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, for Pete's sake. You are probably lying on the couch, with your feet up, eating it anyway. Gravity does wonders.

Ladies: To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the bag with the potatoes.

Real Woman: Buy boxed instant mashed potato mix and keep it in the pantry for up to a year. Add garlic powder, it makes them taste REAL.

Ladies: When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking pan, use a bit of the dry cake mix instead and there won't be any white mess on the outside of the cake.

Real Woman: Go to the bakery - they'll even decorate it for you. What the hell more could you want????

Ladies: Brush some beaten egg white over pie crust before baking to yield a beautiful glossy finish.

Real Woman: Sara Lee frozen pie directions do not include brushing egg whites over the crust, so I just don't do it. No woman in there right mind would go through THAT much trouble.

Ladies: If you have a problem opening jars, try using latex dishwashing gloves. They give a non slip grip that makes opening jars easy.

Real Woman: Go ask the very hot neighbor guy to do it. AND you can entertain yourself watching one of his BIG muscles bulge. IMAGINE the possibilities there !

And finally the most important tip....

Ladies: Don't throw out all that leftover wine. Freeze into ice cubes for future use in casseroles and sauces.

Real Woman: Left over wine?????? What friggin leftover wine?? There is NO such thing as left over wine HERE !!!

A good friend will come and bail you out of jail...but, a true friend will be sitting next to you saying, "Damn...that was fun!"